first day of school

I feel like I am on cloud 9. No.....Cloud 99!

Today was the first day of school in our new county. Ryan entered 1st grade, and Nathan went into Pre-K again, as he misses the kindergarten cutoff by 2 weeks. I've had some mixed emotions about school starting. Part of me was counting down the days until I had some free "me time" again. I couldn't wait for that!!!! The other part of me was extremely nervous over the "what ifs" of another new school, and if we would have a repeat of last year.

Just knowing that we are in Williamson Co. helped to silence some of those fears, but the fact that they really didn't know Ryan here, and wondering if he would have transition problems, at first, really made me a bit anxious.

Last year started out soooo bad. Granted, after Ryan''s aide came (who had worked with Ryan & Nathan in the past), things really turned around for the better. Enough so to earn him "most improved student" for the second grading period. But because Ryan had such a hard time transitioning, they thought that was reflective on how Ryan would be for the rest of the year. They also were not used to working with kids with autism in the typical class setting. In Nashville, most of the kids like Ryan end up in segregated classes, therefore most teachers don't get the needed experience. I am proud that Ryan, and his aide Sarah, really turned into teachers themselves and taught great lessons in tolerance and just how far people can go when you give them a chance. When we left last year, everyone was disappointed that Ryan would not be back. Literally everyone in the school fell in love with him. Ryan has such charm and personable skills that you just can't help but.

The start of this school year, though, I was not thinking of how Ryan wooed everyone in the end. I was remembering how it started. I was remembering how they made us to feel like we had a monster instead of a son. And then praying that the gains that Ryan made last year would carry over throughout the summer, giving him better coping skills for yet another transition.

Seeing how excited he has been this past week, or so, and seeing the anticipation he had this morning over going back to school, gave me a lot of reassurance that he was at least wanting to get back on track from where he left off last year. I had to hang on to that as we left the house and pulled into the school. I had to tell myself to focus my attention to that positive, instead of remembering the negatives. That alone gave me the strength to walk into school without a chip or fear of failure on my shoulder. Once we got into the school it all went so fast that I didn't have time to have even a minute minute of fear. To say that Ryan was happy to be back in school would be an understatement. He totally fell back in place...even without his beloved Sarah. He went right to his desk, spoke to his teachers, upon command, without having to be prompted, and just looked 100% at ease. To look at him it would have been very hard to tell that he moved into a brand new house (first time to move) just 2 1/2 months ago. He's had so many transitions in a short period of time, but he's done an incredible job in adjusting. Today was proof.

After we left Ryan, to take Nathan to his school, I couldn't help but think of how wonderful and smooth it went compared to last year. I thought back on the first day of school last year. Ryan could not stay at school due to the central office overlooking paperwork and not appointing an assistant to help him. And how he ended up missing almost the first week of school because of that. Then once they did get "someone" out to help him they ended up doing more harm than good because they were not trained in how best to work with him. I think we went through a good 2 months of anxiety before Ryan's permanent aide came and turned things around.

In essence, we went from Ryan having to leave school the first day last year, due to no aide, to being greeted by the student support teacher AND 2 aides WAITING just for him this year!! To see that they were ready for him, felt comfortable with him and showed confidence in working with kids with autism made me feel completely 100% comfortable leaving him. Throughout the morning, though, Dave and I found ourselves asking "I wonder how Ryan is doing?" When I pulled into the school at 12:00 to pick him up, after his first half day, I noticed that a part of me got that anxious feeling I had last year when I pulled into the school during that awful time. There were hardly ever any good reports then, and all I had to look forward to was that Ryan was not being given the boot on that day! What a tremendous relief and smile on my face when I was greeted by a smiling Ryan AND a smiling support teacher saying, "it's been a fantastic day!" The FIRST day! The first day at a new school, in a new district, with brand new teachers and staff!

Words cannot describe how proud of Ryan I was. The amount of pride, joy and relief I felt are just beyond my ability to express. However, after talking to a couple of friends of mine afterward, they both commented on hearing it in my voice. I hope that was the case.

My plan was to take the boys home and fix them lunch after school, but after a day like that, they deserved an outing of pancakes and chocolate milk! That was one of the best lunches the 3 of us have ever had together.

As far as Nathan's day went. He went to school for an hour of orientation and loved it! It seemed like a small world when we walked into his class and were greeted by Nathan's teacher who already knew him! She did her internship at Vanderbilt when Nathan was a student there 2 years ago. In fact, she worked with the aide (Sarah) that Ryan had last year when Sarah was at Vandy teaching. The full circle of all of this is really pretty awesome...given that we are now in a totally different school district over 30 miles away. And I mean full circle in literal terms...the house we bought is on Winners Circle Place!

Going full circle (or in some cases not) was totally worth the trip!